What is the serpent with a long memory? This concept is based on Law 19, Know Who You’re Dealing With – Do Not Offend the Wrong Person, from the 48 Laws of Power book.
This type of person won’t get mad immediately if he gets hurt or tricked. He’s more like the type who plans things out and waits. And when the time is right, he’ll get back at you, but in a clever and calculated way. You can spot him by how smart and sneaky he is in different parts of his life. He’s usually not the warm and fuzzy type.
If you’re dealing with this person, you better watch out. If you’ve somehow done something to upset him, either deal with it or get him out of your life.
Key Insights
Other Types Of People You Should Not Offend
As you climb up the ladder of power and success, you’ll encounter all sorts of people—some who challenge you, some who fall for tricks, and some who get taken advantage of.
The real skill in being powerful is knowing how to tell the tough players from the easy ones, the clever folks from the simple ones, and the go-getters from the scavengers.
You’ll do well without forcing anyone around if you can figure this out. But if you deal with everyone the same way, you’re in for a lot of trouble and probably a tough life. So, understanding different types of people and knowing how to handle them is super important.
Law 19: Know Who You’re Dealing With – Do Not Offend the Wrong Person
There are many different kinds of people in the world, and you can never assume that everyone will react to your strategies similarly. Deceive or outmaneuver some people; they will spend the rest of their lives seeking revenge. They are wolves in lambs’ clothing. Choose your victims and opponents carefully, then—never offend or deceive the wrong person.
Robert Greene
The Arrogant and Proud Man
This guy’s got a super fragile ego, which makes him risky to mess with. Even a tiny thing that seems like a slight can trigger a massive, crazy revenge response from him.
You might think, “I just said that thing at a party when everyone was having a blast…” It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t think straight when he goes all out, so don’t try to understand his wild reactions.
If you ever notice someone is super touchy and easily offended, it’s best to get out of there. It’s not worth the trouble, no matter what you’re hoping for from him.
The Hopelessly Insecure Man
This person is like those arrogant and proud people but is sneakier and not as in-your-face. His confidence is shaky, and he’s not so sure about himself.
If he thinks you tricked or went after him, he won’t explode, but he’ll keep feeling hurt inside. He’ll pick at you slowly; it might take ages before you notice.
If you realize you messed with this kind of guy, it’s a good idea to give him a lot of space for a while. Don’t hang around; he’ll keep bugging you like a little nibble until it drives you nuts.
Mr. Suspicion
This type is like a future version of Soviet dictator Joseph Stalin. He tends to see the worst in others and thinks everyone’s out to get him. We can call him Mr. Suspicion.
Interestingly, he’s the least risky of the bunch. He’s genuinely unstable, which means he’s easy to trick—just like Stalin was fooled a lot.
You can use his suspicious nature to make him doubt other folks. But here’s the thing: if he starts suspecting you, be careful. It could get messy.
The Plain, Unassuming, and Often Unintelligent Man
You’re all ears when you spot someone who looks easy to fool. But this guy is more complex to trick than you might think.
Falling for a trick often requires smarts and creativity—a sense of the possible rewards. The plain guy won’t take the bait because he doesn’t see it. He’s that clueless.
The issue with this person isn’t that he’ll hurt you or go all for all-out revenge, but he’ll waste your time, energy, and even your sanity trying to outsmart him.
Here’s a tip: test him with a joke or story. If he takes things too literally, you’ve got this type on your hands. Keep going if you want, but it’s a risk.
The Invisible Advantage: Mastering the Art of Reading People
Knowing how to read people and understand who you’re up against is the ultimate skill for gaining and holding onto power. Seriously, it’s a game-changer.
Without this skill, you’re in the dark: you’ll tick off the wrong people, team up with the wrong crowd, and think you’re being all nice when you’re rude.
Before you make any moves, figuring out the person you’re dealing with is crucial. If you skip this step, you’ll waste time and mess things up.
Study their weak spots, the areas where they’re not so strong, and what makes them proud or shaky. Know them inside and out before you decide whether you want to get involved with them.
Beyond Gut Feelings: Why Trusting Instincts Alone Can Cost You Big
Don’t go by your instincts alone when figuring out what your opponent is about. Making decisions based solely on those fuzzy feelings will lead to some of the biggest mistakes you could make.
You can’t swap accurate, solid information for those vague vibes. The best thing to do is to dig deep, study, and closely watch your opponent. Take as much time as you need to understand them inside out.
This might require some patience, but the payoff is worth it. You’ll be glad you put in the effort when things start falling into place.
Beneath the Mask: The Wisdom of Looking Beyond Appearances.
It would be best to never put your faith in how things seem at first glance. It’s easy for someone with a tricky agenda to pretend to be nice and friendly, masking their true intentions.
On the flip side, someone who seems all tough on the outside might be scared deep down. The key here is to develop the skill of seeing past the surface and the mixed signals.
You can’t fully trust the image that people project—it’s not a reliable source of information. Don’t take their self-presentation at face value because it’s hardly accurate. It’s like trying to judge a book by its cover; the real story is hidden beneath the surface.
Tactics of the Wild: Why Tailoring Your Approach is the Key to Success
Imagine being a hunter. You wouldn’t set up the same kind of trap for a wolf as you would for a fox. It would be best to change your tactics based on the animal you’re after.
You won’t put bait in a place where no one will fall for it. A skilled hunter knows their target inside out—their habits, their favorite hiding spots—so they can hunt in a way that works best.
It’s all about knowing your prey like the back of your hand and tailoring your approach accordingly. Like how you might tackle different levels in a video game with unique strategies, hunting cleverly means adapting to the situation to succeed.
Be convinced that there are no persons so insignificant and inconsiderable but may, some time or other, have it in their power to be of use to you, which they indeed will not if you have once shown them contempt. Wrongs are often forgiven, but contempt never is. Our pride remembers it forever.
Lord Chesterfield
Lessons From The Past: Story Of A Serpent With A Long Memory
In ancient China, around the 5th century B.C., Prince Ch’ung-erh from Ch’in had been forced to live in exile. He patiently awaited a chance to return home and regain his princely life.
During his travels, he passed through Cheng, where the ruler treated him poorly, not recognizing his status. Even when Shu Chan, a minister, pointed out Ch’ung-erh’s worthiness, the ruler didn’t listen and insulted the prince again. Shu Chan warned that if the ruler couldn’t treat Ch’ung-erh respectfully, it might lead to future calamity.
Years later, Ch’ung-erh returned home in a changed situation, remembering those who helped him and those who mistreated him during his difficult times. He gathered an army and avenged Cheng, obliterating the kingdom and exiling the ruler.
This story teaches us that we can’t predict a person’s future influence. Someone unimportant today might hold great power tomorrow. We tend to forget many things, but insults stick in our memory. The ruler of Cheng couldn’t have known that Prince Ch’ung-erh was ambitious, cunning, and held grudges.
Since he couldn’t have known, it would have been wiser not to take unnecessary risks by being disrespectful. There’s no benefit in needlessly offending others, even if they seem weak. Suppress the urge to insult because that vulnerable person might be able to harm you today.