This article tackles Law 38: Think As You Like But Behave Like Others, from the 48 Laws of Power book. Let’s get real – standing out and showing your true colors can sometimes bring on the tough stuff. People might judge, criticize, or even try to put you down just because you’re not following the crowd.
It’s not easy when your specialness isn’t understood and valued. It’s like you’re walking on eggshells, trying to fit in to avoid getting the cold shoulder or even worse.
Have you ever felt torn between being yourself and fitting in? We get it. It’s a real challenge. But guess what? We’ve got this guide for you. Here, you’ll learn the art of balancing self-expression and fitting into society. Then, we’ll dive into the secrets of being true to yourself without feeling like an outsider.
Law 38: Think As You Like But Behave Like Others
If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that you only want attention and look down upon them. They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior. It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who will appreciate your uniqueness.
Robert Greene
Key Insights
Why We All Wear Masks and Keep Our Feelings Secret
Let’s talk real-talk about something we all do – telling little white lies and hiding our true feelings. The truth is, being completely open and honest always isn’t how society works. From a young age, we learn to keep our thoughts hidden.
Why do we do this? Well, it’s a survival instinct. We don’t want to upset or offend others, so we tell them what they want to hear. It’s like a dance we do to avoid stepping on anyone’s toes.
And let’s face it, most of the time, it’s just easier. There are specific ideas and values that most people agree on, so there’s no point in arguing about them. We believe what we want to think, but we put on a mask on the outside.
The Battle of Beliefs: Why Arguments Often Backfire
Now, let’s dive into the clash of beliefs. Some people can’t stand the idea of holding back. They want to shout from the rooftops about how their values and beliefs are the best. But here’s the kicker: it usually doesn’t work out well.
Why? Well, most people are set in their ways regarding what they believe. Their ideas and values are wrapped up with emotion, like a cozy blanket. They don’t want to shake things up.
It often backfires when you try to challenge them, either directly with your words or indirectly through your actions. They get defensive and a little bit mad.
So, while some folks might be out to prove their beliefs are superior, they usually end up convincing just a few people and ticking off a lot more. Ultimately, it’s all about understanding that beliefs run deep, and trying to change someone’s mind can be like trying to move a mountain.
The Art of Playing It Smart: How The Wise Ones Navigate Beliefs
Let’s talk about the savvy ones among us – those who figure out early on that they can go along with the crowd, nodding at the usual ideas without buying into them. It’s like a secret superpower.
Why do they do this? They’re after the sweet freedom to think and say what they genuinely believe without drawing unwanted attention or backlash. They can share their thoughts with close friends while keeping a low profile.
Once these clever individuals find themselves in positions of influence, they can start to spread their ideas – but they do it subtly. It’s like planting seeds without shouting about it.
So, the lesson here is that wisdom often involves playing the game, blending in when needed, and then working your magic from the shadows when the time is right.
The Hidden Beliefs of Marranos
Picture Spain in the late 14th century. The Jews were in big trouble. The Spanish started mistreating them, killing thousands and kicking many out of the country. Those who stayed had to become Christians, at least in name. But something curious happened over the next 300 years.
The Spanish noticed that some of these converted Jews, called Marranos (initially a not-so-nice name), acted like good Christians in public but secretly held onto their Jewish beliefs. They’d attend church, marry into fancy families, and look like model Christians. But guess what? Late in life, it would be discovered that they were still practicing Jews in secret.
How did they pull this off? Well, they were experts at pretending. They’d wear crosses, give money to churches, and even say some not-so-nice things about Jews while keeping their true beliefs hidden. They knew that what you show on the outside matters most in society.
And here’s the thing – this sneaky strategy still works today. The trick is to blend in and act like you’re the most hardcore believer in whatever’s considered normal. People won’t suspect that you have different thoughts in private.
It’s like a game of appearances: make a big show of fitting in, and no one will guess what’s happening inside your head.
The Art of Adaptation: Why Bismarck’s Social Chameleon Approach Still Works
In social interaction, one invaluable skill stands out: the ability to be everything to everyone. When you step into society, you shed your ideas and values like an old coat and wear the mask that suits your group.
Bismarck, the infamous Prussian diplomat, is the mastermind of this practice and played this game expertly for years. Some had a vague sense of what he was up to but lacked the clarity to make a difference.
Why does this strategy work so well? It’s because people love the idea that you share their beliefs. They’ll eagerly take the bait because it strokes their ego. And here’s the trick – you won’t be accused of hypocrisy if you’re careful.
After all, how can they label you a hypocrite if you never reveal your proper stance? They won’t see you as lacking values, either. Of course, you have values – the ones you adopt while in their company.
So, embrace your inner chameleon and learn from Bismarck – adapt, connect, and thrive in any social setting.
Embrace the Flock: Why It’s Safer to Blend In
Imagine a big group of sheep. Most of them look the same, except for one. This one sheep is black, while the others are white. This black sheep isn’t sure if it belongs to the group, so it hangs back or goes off alone. But this isn’t a good idea because it can attract dangerous wolves that want to eat it.
So, here’s the lesson: It’s safer to stay with the group. Don’t show off your differences like the black sheep’s black wool. Instead, keep them inside, like a secret in your mind. Doing this will make you safer because there’s strength in numbers. Stick with the group, and you’ll be more protected. Remember, being together is better.
When to Stand Out: Lessons from Lyndon Johnson and Caligula
Sometimes, being different is good, but only when you’re already critical. When you’re super powerful, you can show your uniqueness to remind everyone how special you are. Let’s look at two examples: Lyndon Johnson, the President of the United States, and Caligula, a Roman emperor.
Lyndon Johnson did some unusual things, like having meetings while sitting on the toilet. Nobody else could do that, and he wanted to show he didn’t have to follow the same rules as everyone else.
Roman Emperor, Caligula, took it even further. He wore women’s clothes or bathrobes when important people came over, and he even tried to make his horse a consul (an essential job in ancient Rome). But this didn’t work out well for him because people disliked it, eventually leading to his downfall.
Here’s the important lesson: Even if you’re powerful, it’s a good idea to connect with regular people because, at some point, you might need their help. So, being a little different is okay, but remember to be friendly with everyone else, too.
Law 38 in Action: How to Navigate Life by Thinking Freely and Acting Wisely
The idea of “Think as You Like, But Behave Like Others” from Law 38 can be helpful in many real-life situations. Here’s how you can use it:
Workplace Politics: At work, there are rules and customs. If you don’t like them, it’s usually better to fit in quietly while trying to change things.
Cultural Sensitivity: When in a different culture, follow their customs, even if you disagree.
Family Gatherings: Avoid fights at family gatherings by not arguing about sensitive topics like politics or religion. You can keep your beliefs to yourself and keep the peace.
Social Media: Be careful on social media. What you say can spread quickly, so think before you post.
Networking: When making friends or professional contacts, find things you have in common. It’s easier to get along when you focus on what you share.
Artistic Work: Artists sometimes hide their bold ideas so they don’t get in trouble or reach a smaller audience.
Education: In school, do what’s expected, even if you disagree. Later, you can follow your interests.
Public Speaking: When you talk to a group, consider what they want to hear. You can still be yourself, but make it relatable.
Politics and Activism: People in politics and activists know that significant changes take time. They start by agreeing with most people’s thoughts and slowly introducing their ideas.
Religious Places: In places where one religion is vital, it’s often safer to practice your beliefs privately without arguing with the dominant religion.
Starting a Business: When you start a business in a field that already exists, copying what works first is a good idea. Later, you can be different and try new things.
Making Friends: When you meet new people, it helps to talk about what you have in common at first. Later, you can tell them about your unique ideas.
Choosing Clothes: Sometimes, it’s better to wear normal clothes for important events like job interviews. Once you’re in, you can show your style.
Group Projects: When you work in a team, it’s good to start by doing what the group agrees on. Then, you can share your different ideas.
Science Research: Scientists with new ideas sometimes need to prove themselves first. Once they’re trusted, their big ideas can make a significant impact.
Remember, you don’t have to fight every battle. Sometimes, it’s wiser to fit in and save your unique thoughts for the right time and place.